In the summer of 2009, I lost a very good friend to bone
cancer. Nancey had battled cancer for 6
years and had two bone marrow transplants.
We met in 1973 as new employees at a mortgage company. I started in April and she started in
May. We
worked in the collection department with two other women. Our hours were 10:15 to 7:30 PM. Management felt we would find more people at
home during those hours. But this has
nothing to do with today’s post.
Over the years, Nancey and I were work friends and then out-of-the-office
friends. As each of us moved on to
different jobs in and out of the company, we kept in touch. There were a couple of periods in time when
we drifted apart but always managed to reconnect.
Nancey had a mind of her own which got her into trouble with
management on occasion. She was never
afraid to speak her mind. She also had a
huge interest in the afterlife. She
believed in spirits and their ability to connect to the living. She loved ghost stories and spooky movies in
general. I remember once we went to a
double feature of Alien and one other movie but I can’t remember the name. She sat there, eyes wide open and thoroughly
enjoying the movies while I cringed or hid my eyes.
One time we went to Disneyland and Universal Studios. We had a blast riding all the rides. At some point in the ride, they always take
your picture and you can buy them. We
bought several pictures from different rides.
In each picture, there she is; eyes wide open, leaning forward with a
smile on her face. She loved the
excitement. (and there I am cringing;
wondering if I’m going to live through the ride!)
Towards the end of Nancey’s illness, we talked about a lot
of things including her upcoming end of life.
One day, we went to lunch at the Olive Garden; one of her favorite
places. I knew her appetite had waned
over the months but I watched my friend order soup, salad, breadsticks,
eggplant parmigana and a luscious desert.
She enjoyed and ate every bite.
During our lunch, we talked again about things. I suggested we come up with a ‘signal’ for
her to contact me after she passed; just like Houdini did with his wife. She really liked that idea. We decided to think about it and then talk
again. Unfortunately, that was the last
meal we shared and the last time I saw her.
Over the years since her passing, nothing out of the
ordinary has happened. I do think about
her occasionally and especially whenever I wore a butterfly pin (one of 3
pieces of jewelry she gave me). Two
weeks ago, I was sitting in my living room and my light began to flicker. I’m thinking the light bulb is loose so I
check and it’s on tight. I keep watching
the light and I think, is that Nancey? I
laughed and said out loud, “Nancey is that you?
You’ll have to do better than this.
I don’t speak flicker!”
The light has never flickered again since that night but I
do wonder about the cause. Was it
Nancey? Or do I just need a new lamp?
